Think Big, Henry..

The following is an extract from the “Nixon Tapes”, when the then President of the US was discussing US policy towards Laos  and North Vietnam with Secretary of State, Henry Kissinger.

Nixon;   how many did we kill in Laos ?

HK; we killed about 10 or 15 thousand

Nixon; I still think we ought to take the dikes out. Will that drown people?

HK; about two hundred thousand people.

Nixon; No, No No I’d rather use the nuclear bomb. Have you got that Henry?

HK; That I think would be just too much.

Nixon; The nuclear bomb...does that bother you?....I just want you to think big Henry, for Christsakes.

I hope that  the Royals were not too offended by my not attending their recent wedding; So as not to give too much offence I have made a mental note that I should  attend the inevitable divorce in due course. But in any event I did my best; I drank Earl Grey tea, while listening to my Daily Mail CD of patriotic songs, wearing my Union Jack boxers. Oh yes, it was just like a little bit of old England here.

Not that we have been without excitement of our own. We have been engulfed by election fever (if that is not a mixed metaphor).Maybe that is putting it a bit strongly; not exactly engulfed and not really fever;  possibly  instead imagine the excitement surrounding a municipal by election in Tunbridge Wells on a wet and cold Thursday in February. The local polling station was the football stadium, although there was no evidence of anyone going in or coming out or even hanging around. The election itself was held on Saturday, but I believe that to expedite publication of the results, the votes were counted on Friday. They have not announced the voting turn out yet, but no doubt it will be of the order of 96.5 %; though to get a more credible figure I suggest you just edge the decimal point a tiny bit towards the left.

I wonder if anyone is old enough to remember a play and film called The Iceman Cometh?  I have no idea what it was about, but I am happy to advise you that the Iceman is alive and well and serving the villagers of Ban Narluang. He comes round on a pick up truck with 2 cold boxes, from which a young lad with a mask but not gloves, fills up bags of ice. Not being wholly confident about the source of the water being used, I have not felt tempted to avail myself of this facility. For different reasons I have not used another delivery service which I also saw for the first time this week; cigarettes delivered to your door!  Is this in case you get out of breath going to the shop?

OK, this is where the Blog gets exciting...yes!  It’s Vegetable Time. As ever let’s start with fruit. The last of the tomatoes are about to be picked and I have sown some more .But recent  heavy rain (see below) may have washed the seeds out .The lemon is at a difficult point in its career....it has recovered sufficiently to be re-potted. Will it survive the ordeal?  I guess it’s time I gave alms. The dill from the 99pence shop is doing brilliantly, and so chives from the same source have been sown. The (maybe) peppers have been re-potted and are looking sturdy while the chillies continue to be the talk of the village, or at least the fact that a falang is growing them is s source of wonder, given the universal belief that falangs do not go near chillies. Currently my plants are growing in something that is between concrete and mud but I am told what I need to do is just go to the river and scoop up some excellent soil; now why didn't I think of that instead of wondering where to buy some?

About the rain; the guide books says that April is a month of modest rainfall, and maybe that is right. However, the last 2 weeks have been quite wet and as I write this it is has been raining without much of a break for about 16 hours. I feel more than a little sorry for the builders next door living on site in their crude plywood and plastic sheeted hut. Between the rains it is very hot and sticky, with the mornings really being the nicest part of the day. The rains tend to arrive late afternoon, but always with plenty of notice so you do not usually need to get caught out in them. Sadly, the rain has done a lot of damage to the amazing blossoms, white, pink, red, purple, orange that were all on the tree until a few days ago.  If I get my camera back before  I post this I will see if there are still enough examples of the blossom to include a few here. In fact, although I have been granted use of my camera for 24 hours, before it goes on loan again I have not had time to take any photos yet. However, I am going to cheat and include a few of the photos that Novice Kamphay took on his visit to his home village.

Last night it was not the rain but the insects (biting) and dogs (howling) which kept me awake. Happily I can report a bulls eye on the dog next door, which meant that from 1am onwards he retired into his kennel and made no further contribution to the debate. The insects are harder to intimidate and I write this with   a mug of coffee on one side of me and a can of insect spray on the other. Having said that, it is 7.35 am  now and I  am about to retire indoors and put on some loud music as one of the villagers has decided that it is time we all had the benefit of his hi –fi system.

The children have long since abandoned their kites and  have returned to alternative forms of play. The boys have taken up break dancing for which they seem to have great facility. I am pleased to note that they are happy to dance in silence without the necessity for any rap or drum and bass accompaniment.

 Mixed groups of boys and girls make  a circle where a form of ‘tag’ of ‘tag”’ or ‘catch me’ is played with the pursuer hopping, while the pursued can run freely around the ring. I also saw yesterday a form of tug-of-war being played using a bamboo pole rather than a rope. For non western readers “tug-of –war” involves teams pulling on a long rope, attempting to drag their opponents over a line marked in the ground. Football, too, of course remains popular despite the condition of the playing field. Professionals in the UK might benefit from seeing how these kids, with no shoes on, just pick themselves up from a fall or a challenge or twisted ankle and get on with the game without the need to roll around in helpless agony for 2 or 3 minutes.

Today they are making good use of the puddles on the school field.

The sources and the reasons behind rumours are often as interesting as the rumours themselves. I am able to share with you a rumour about myself, (as Oscar Wilde said, ‘there is only one thing worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about’). Apparently, the headman in the village where we are buying land for our school project has only one concern about the scheme, and that is that I appear to be a religious fanatic! Given that my meeting with him was conducted with him mostly unable to take eyes off the TV screen. and having no English in which to engage me in discussions of a religious or any other kind of nature, it is odd how he formed that opinion....if he did. I am assuming, for want of any better ideas that I am a Christian fanatic. But maybe not. If I have any Divine revelations over the next few weeks I shall, of course feel obliged to share them with you if only to divert you from the paths of sin and sloth on which so many of  you currently tread.

There are very few tourists around now, although I am told their number will be expanded next week by a visitation from the Australian embassy in Vientiane. They are apparently convening a meeting of all Australian expats to discuss what to do in the event of an emergency situation breaking out. I wonder what they know that the rest of us do not? The fact that there are 10 people coming makes it sound like more of a jolly than a serious event....is that one staff member per expat? I am not sure what we Brits will do in such an event given that we have no embassy in Laos. I presume we shall be expected to muddle through in our traditional spirit.  We shall commandeer all available stocks of gin, and the ladies will knit scarves and gloves.  I think that has always worked in the past. Maybe I should acquire a ‘high visibility’ jacket to wear, as that is what some rather cynical policemen  in London once told me were their instructions in the event of a major emergency

My friend and colleague, Teng came up to Luang Prabang 2 weeks ago on  the plane from VTE; he  was the only passenger ! It was good that Air Lao is offering this private charter service to the Lao Educational Opportunities Trust; anyone wanting to fly on TENG 1 should contact us.

 

Best wishes

Alan