Weather....

...yes, rather strange to tell, but we have some. Last night it rained for several hours, and today  I have been forced inside 3 times because of showers. It is significantly warmer in the mornings and I have resumed taking breakfast outside, after a week or so when it was not really possible. Eating outside is much preferable, of course, as it means I can throw boulders at the village dogs without having to rise from my chair. The weather was also quite sticky yesterday; I got rather  tired walking home from the market; although that is partly caused by still feeling a bit weak after my clash with the spring rolls. (One local cafe owner looked distinctly nervous when I told her about the food poisoning....she calmed down once I assured her that tuna sandwich was not a suspect.)

In the market, a bread stall, which appeared to be unmanned, was in fact in the very capable hands of a little lad, who could not have been a day older than 8. By using his fingers, he was able to give  me the price for a loaf of bread, and when I did not have the exact money, he had no problem at all in giving me the correct change. Remarkably grown up and efficient, but a reminder of how quickly kids have to grow up here and how short is their childhood. In the market, it is clear that fruit is not at its best right now. The Thai oranges are wonderful and last of the melons too, are very good, but there is quite a lot missing from the shelves right now. Still I suspect the range and quality is still superior to that of Tesco in Enfield...or any other UK town, for that matter.

I said that I feared that  the coming of the water last week, would deprive me of one of my topics, but all I can say for now is, "I wish". I have the shower, flush toilet and handbasin, but the sink is proving  a long drawn out affair. Right now, my sitting room has several lengths of pipe, about 7 plastic  bags, 2 tool bags, sundry tools spread about the places and too many piping joints and fixtures to count.
But the water supply is far from constant. Just like the electricity supply was up to a year ago, it is subject to regular "outages". Between about 6pm and 8pm I usually  have no water; I can only assume that that is a period of high demand, and the system simply cannot cope.

My lane and the one parallel, are to be upgraded. Right now they are dusty tracks which become rivers in the rainy season. As the first move in this, the authorities deliver dumper trucks full of earth once or twice a week. This has led to the development of our own "cargo cult". Instead of things being washed up on the beach, great wealth is, after much prayer, delivered by dumper truck. Once it arrives it is seized upon by the locals who emerge with shovels and wheelbarrows, and no sooner is it delivered then much of it is removed. Why, I have no idea. Maybe people are building back garden mounds in honour of the Dumper Truck Gods?

Well, whatever it is, one thing is certain and that is that when the authorities come to start  the job,the material they need for it will have long since gone and nobody will have any explanation for its disappearance. One more small victory for "the people".

 Some weeks ago, "they" also came up the lane, digging holes for fence posts to replace the fence on the boundary  of the school playing field. (Now I might have taken the view that some books might have been a more useful way to spend money, rather than a fence, but that is another issue). I am not claiming that the holes have been stolen, though in Laos, people can find a use for most things, but they are certainly disappearing, and again, when the time comes for stage 2 of the plan, they will have to start by re-excavating  the holes. I just hope that the village will not  thus be exceeding its quota of publicly funded holes.

On a similar topic really I suppose, my neighbours have advised  me to build a small fence around the standpipe where my water comes in, or "bad people will steal my water". Now water is metered so if anyone does help themselves then I have to pay for it. But I think I shall wait  for my first bill to arrive before putting my water behind fences and armed guards. How odd that in a "communist" country, notions of private ownership, even of water, should be so much to the fore.

Does anyone know if Obama is still proposing to carry out his promise to close down Guantanamo Bay camp?   I ask as I would be very eager to put in a bid for one of those headsets once they become surplus to requirements. The ownership of one would render my plans to cut the electricity lines to the 3 or 4 houses in the village who pump out  loud pop music 24/7 unnecessary. The headsets will be enough, I don't think I need the rest of the kit. And orange does not really suit me....so I shall not be joining the temple just yet.

Just one village death to report this week. An elderly Hmong gentleman. I was rather surprised but pleased that the "voluntary" levy  of 30,000 kip per household applied to ethnic minorities too, even if (as I suspect) that their funeral rites are not so drawn out or expensive. It will be interesting to see if the funeral is held in the village or in a more Hmong-centered community.

One of you has kindly suggested that I convert the blog into a radio play and submit it to the BBC with a view to winning a prize of 2,500 pounds. It is an amusing idea, but the major obstacle is that a blog is essentially an egotistical device in which "I' appear throughout, leaving everyone else with small  walk-on parts of the "Dinner is served My Lord" variety. I fear I lack the skill to develop the characters of the builders, the lady at the Water Company, various passers-by and, door to door sales persons. Creating dialogue between myself and dogs, goats, cockerels and snakes also feels rather intimidating, and I should hesitate to create yet another "drunken ex-pat" play, swilling gin, remembering when I "was somebody", and how world has changed and you can no longer get honest servants to work for peanuts. Of course the whole thing would have to be played  out...and sometimes drowned out.....with a background of incessant Lao pop music of an especially maudlin and tuneless variety. I do not think that I shall be bidding for "The Archers" slot just yet.

Alan